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Scottish Books - a selection of books written by Scottish Writers or about Scotland.

Title and author : Ned Speak by Stuart McLean

Ned Speak - Translation from Ned Language to English

If you live in Scotland, live within 10,000 miles of Scotland, know someone who might possibly be a bit Scottish or can spell the word Scottish - you MUST buy this book.

Learn the lingo of the Scottish Ned - and you will love them even more.

 

Extracts:

Banjoed
discordant verb
Should you meet a Ned on the high street who asks if you would like to be ‘banjoed’ do not be fooled into thinking he wishes to serenade you with a musical instrument. The phrase is merely a courtesy warning that you will be shortly be rushing to A&E.


Emdy
noun
A contraction of the English term ‘anybody’. The word is invariably used in conjunction with the word ‘gorra’ to produce the phrase ‘Emdy gorra’. This is then suffixed with a variety of works such as ‘fag’, ‘joint’ or 'bloody clue where Ah live’.


Hee Haw
noun
Ned speak for the English expression ‘bugger all’. Often used as part of the courting ritual between Ned and Nedette. The Ned will inquire, “Fancy a shag?” The Nedette will reply indignantly “Ur gettin’ hee haw!” Fifteen minutes later they’re going at it like dogs in heat at the nearest bus shelter.
 

Rat Arsed
noun
As drinking is a favourite pastime there are many terms for ‘being drunk’ in Ned speak. Rat-arsed, blootered, charred, stoshus, dunted, steamin, oot yer face, rubber, blazin, stoavin, steamboats, buzzin, ful eh it, bongoed, mad wae it, mutted, are just a few.

 

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