The Joke :
For his eighteenth birthday a rich aunt gives Paul a bale of tartan and money to have a kilt made. He goes to a kilt maker and gets measured up. As he's a bit shy he asks the kilt maker to make some matching undies. Two weeks later Paul goes back to the shop.
'Your kilt and underwear are ready,' says the kilt maker. 'and there was five yards of material left over.'
'That's grand,' replies Paul, 'Maybe I could get my girlfriend a matching kilt.'
Paul rushed home. Excitedly he pulls on the kilt. He loves it so much he immediately dashes round to show his girlfriend. Unfortunately, in his excitement, he forgot to don his underwear.
When his girlfriend answers the door, Paul does a twirl and said, 'Well, what do you think?'
'Wow,' she exclaims.
'But here's the biggest surprise,' he screeches, yanking up the kilt, 'have you ever seen anything like that?'
'Oh, my God,' says his girlfriend, 'that's amazing.'
'Well I've got five more yards at home,' says Paul eagerly. 'I'd be happy to let you have it anytime'
[From Why Did the Haggis Cross the Road by Stuart McLean]